Competition Winners
Surrey County Council creative writing competition winners
Here are the two winners from the Surrey County Council creative writing competition, supported by Young Writer.
The Walking Bath!
Once upon a time there was a beautiful Queen and King. Now this pretty Queen and King had a bath, but it wasn’t just any old bath it was a white bath, and the thing the Queen and King liked the best was the golden dragon feet, these were beautiful! The Queen adored this bath.
The next day the Queen said to her husband “I am going to have a bath my dear,” “OK” said her husband. So the Queen went and got into the bath. A peculiar noise came from the feet of the bath like a groaning noise, “Oh dear” said the queen, “The bath is broken”. So she told her husband after her bath.
The next day she went for a bath again and fell asleep in it! Now this bath had once been a dragon and a witch and turned him into a bath. This bath was a very cheeky bath and he liked getting people embarrassed, so he started walking out of the house!
When he was outside he had to quickly hide behind the wall because the King was looking out the window. The King soon got bored and went to make some dinner and some pudding. The bath got up and quietly crept to the drive, but the gardeners were there so he hid by the car.
Then he went headed into town and how the people laughed at the Queen, “Haha” they went! But when they noticed the bath was walking they got scared and called the police. The police came running into town. When they saw the bath they ran up to it and said, “Stop!” The bath stopped and the police looked into the bath. They couldn’t help laughing at the Queen. When they had finished laughing and checking it really was the Queen they quickly went and got the TV men (and women). The police asked them to film it so they said “Yes we will”. The bath started running into town like it has done before. The men filmed until the police came up again and said, “Stop!”
The bath stopped and the film men went closer and got a shot of the Queen naked! Then the Queen woke up and everyone ran away at once. The Queen said, “Where the heck am I? Goodness I am in the middle of town!” Then she suddenly remembered that she was in the bath and she got very worried. “I hope no one saw me,” she said. Then she quietly crept home with the bath. If she saw anybody she would quickly hide. At last she got home.
The Queen felt better when she saw on the news that nobody had been in town and nobody had seen her, peculiarly it was told by a policeman with a smile on his face! So the Queen went to bed peacefully. But the next day the Queen watched the news again and how angry and embarrassed she was! She went straight to the police and they said “Glad you watch the morning news Madam”. Then they gave the Queen a holiday and lots of money and everyone apologised!
Lydia Thornhill (6), Farnham, Surrey
First Prize winner in 5 - 7 year old category
How the Hippopotamus came to be
A newly discovered Just So Story
Now my best beloved, in the time of the wild greasy green crocodile, there was no such thing as a hippopotamus. So just sit back in your seats and listen to how the time of the hippopotamus began.
Once, on the bank of the round, red-brown, reedy Rando Lake, there was a greasy green crocodile. Now, my best beloved, this greasy green crocodile ate fat frogs. This diet was beginning to tie him; instead, he wanted to eat ferns like his enemy, the great grey elephant. Meanwhile, the great grey elephant was looking longingly at the fat frogs that the greasy green crocodile ate. He angrily reminded himself that they were enemies and so he couldn’t ask for some fat frogs.
After a month of looking at each other’s food they had had enough. You see, my best beloved, when greasy green crocodiles and great grey elephants get angry, there is a terrible noise and damage done wherever they are. The battle between the greasy green crocodile and the great grey elephant lasted for days, destroying the whole bank around which they were fighting. Eventually a sagacious ant came up and squeaked, “Why don’t you have a competitive contest to see which animal deserves to have the other’s food?” Everyone thought this was a brilliant idea and so the competitive contest began.
For the first task of the competitive contest, they had an eating contest. The challenge was that they had to eat in each other’s style. This was very difficult because the great grey elephants are not made to eat fat frogs in the same way that greasy green crocodiles are not made to eat ferns. But the power of the competitiveness urged them on. As they ate however, a strange thing happened. Their mouths began to change to how they were eating. They began to change to what the mouth of the hippo is today.
The next challenge was to run or swim in the other animal’s place where they lived. They great grey elephant found this hard because he was used to running on the dry, crackly ferns that he ate. The greasy green crocodile found this hard because he was used to wallowing in the gloopy glue-like round, red-brown reedy Rando Lake with the fat frogs he so liked to eat. Eventually their bodies became more like that of the hippo today.
Now my best beloved, the final task was to have a fight. They fight went on with the great grey elephant tossing the greasy green crocodile into the water and then the greasy green crocodile coming back and biting the great grey elephant’s trunk. Eventually, the great grey elephant threw the greasy green crocodile so hard it hurt so his body swelled (to the size of a hippo today). Then the greasy green crocodile bit the great grey elephant on the side so some of his skin fell off and he shrank (to the size of a hippo today). After that, the great grey elephant and the greasy green crocodile flopped down and looked identical. Then the sagacious ant proclaimed in a squeaky voice, “What you see before you is a new creature. It shall be named Hippopotamus until we find another name. From now on, they shall both have their wish; they shall eat fat frogs and ferns.”
And that, my best beloved, is how the hippopotamus came into being.
Toby Saer (10), Cranleigh, Surrey
First Prize winner in 8 - 11 year old category
1 response so far ↓
1 holly // Sep 21, 2008 at 7:53 am
thses are amazing!!!
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